1/? – The Hounds of Overthinking

I have had a few notable moments in my life that I would consider pretty accurate examples of this. Undeniable trials that I was ill-prepared for that I took directly in the teeth like it was my entire goal to make it as painful as possible. Maybe it’s some unfounded sense of copium, but I’d like to think all those situations were what helped shape who I am today, which may or may not be on the same side of the scale for you that I keep it. This is fine, seeing as how we tend to forget to consider the reverse perception and how the person got to that conclusion.

Side note: Listening only to speak; I facepalm every time I catch myself doing it and any content with heavy amounts of it can get to be nails-meet-chalkboard levels of unbearable.

Sorry about that. I’ve just had a lot of time to process not only my current stance in life, but also the one’s prior that railroaded me and left me reacting instead of navigating. The definition of insanity comes to mind here and I definitely needed to not live it this time around. To do a quick tl;dr for those in the back unaware; after four years of my wife fully supporting me every step of the way with a promise in return that if it ever got to be too much or affected myself or us personally, she could hit the pause button on this and I will meet her halfway on all of it. Well, about 50 months later, here we are; a combination of lingering health issues mixed with pretty much everything 2022, and I found myself in a situation where the world I was living froze in time, and it sucked. But I’m not here to complain about it, and you’re probably here because you’re either bored or interested or both.

“Word. Why are you doing this then? Actually, what are we doing exactly?”

Fair question, fictitious character I created for segways. Basically, I have accepted my fate that no matter the circumstance, I have this un-scratchable itch to create and be any digital traveler’s off-interstate attraction worth bookmarking as a brief escape, a break from the firehose pipeline of unmitigated barn-fires that is social media.

As far as the why, very rarely I suspect that the opportunity occurs where content creation doesn’t depend on or at least is affected by the unforgiving levels of what’s considered to be success, that then creates the only means to make the project even possible. I find myself in this situation and I’m over following the rules of the game of an old system that breaks down and shackles creativity by the very format people fall into almost universally at times. This is not throwing shade at anyone specifically, however a good part of this is about the system itself; something of which I will get more into down the road.

To end this point on what I consider to be the main reason for this chapter; I wasn’t able to shake the need to help over the last 50 months, whether it’s hopefully leading someone to a point of clarity, contributing a different outlook for people to potentially consider, or even just the first smile for someone on that given day. So now, I’m in search of that healthy balance between living life without being tethered to wifi and how I continue to contribute my mark within this cyberspace. I’ll never claim to be even the junior varsity of examples of God’s reflection in this world, but that has always sounded like something worth reflecting in a world ever-growing colder.

“But content like that already exists, retard.”

Of course, but that doesn’t change my desire to participate, or attempt a life where I for once chase my goals while not spreading myself too thin or keep feeding coins into the carousel of being less than what people I let in ultimately deserve. The internet can very easily make one feel like the entire human-interactive system is broken, which is a fair assessment, but that doesn’t reflect the hearts of genuine souls that I’ve been blessed to encounter enough to leave zero doubt that they exist; the one’s that get things for what it is and perhaps want to counter-balance their portions of dopamine that’s cooked on a stove cranked to unfathomable levels of bullshit.

“So where do we go from here?”

Now you’re asking the right question that definitely wasn’t pre-planned or rehearsed at all. It’s rather simple actually; I would be honored to take you on this journey that I’m on where I chase digital butterflies and challenge myself to level up my skill sets and creativity, outside the confines that society on all sides can find themselves in by default, while obviously rambling on in a manner that those who have traveled alongside the last couple years know all too well… No schedule, always-evolving, one step after the next… It’s time for me to play a different game entirely, and you are more than welcome to be a part of it. Let’s get weird…

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There’s a fascinating experience to be had during those handful or so pivotal moments in life you can find yourself in that changes your direction in an almost overwhelming, yet arguably necessary fashion. These moments can be riddled with emotion in an internal war that includes becoming a hindsight expert, your own mental-prison guard, a student of God’s guidance while thriving for savant-level epiphanies, and every shade of gray in between; a situation with the ability to leave someone paralyzed while staring down what appears to be an insurmountable obstacle, and yet on the other hand can be such a teaching experience that blooms only under the most specific of conditions.

Side note: Listening only to speak; I facepalm every time I catch myself doing it and any content with heavy amounts of it can get to be nails-meet-chalkboard levels of unbearable.

Sorry about that. I’ve just had a lot of time to process not only my current stance in life, but also the one’s prior that railroaded me and left me reacting instead of navigating. The definition of insanity comes to mind here and I definitely needed to not live it this time around. To do a quick tl;dr for those in the back unaware; after four years of my wife fully supporting me every step of the way with a promise in return that if it ever got to be too much or affected myself or us personally, she could hit the pause button on this and I will meet her halfway on all of it. Well, about 50 months later, here we are; a combination of lingering health issues mixed with pretty much everything 2022, and I found myself in a situation where the world I was living froze in time, and it sucked. But I’m not here to complain about it, and you’re probably here because you’re either bored or interested or both.

“Word. Why are you doing this then? Actually, what are we doing exactly?”

Fair question, fictitious character I created for segways. Basically, I have accepted my fate that no matter the circumstance, I have this un-scratchable itch to create and be any digital traveler’s off-interstate attraction worth bookmarking as a brief escape, a break from the firehose pipeline of unmitigated barn-fires that is social media.

As far as the why, very rarely I suspect that the opportunity occurs where content creation doesn’t depend on or at least is affected by the unforgiving levels of what’s considered to be success, that then creates the only means to make the project even possible. I find myself in this situation and I’m over following the rules of the game of an old system that breaks down and shackles creativity by the very format people fall into almost universally at times. This is not throwing shade at anyone specifically, however a good part of this is about the system itself; something of which I will get more into down the road.

To end this point on what I consider to be the main reason for this chapter; I wasn’t able to shake the need to help over the last 50 months, whether it’s hopefully leading someone to a point of clarity, contributing a different outlook for people to potentially consider, or even just the first smile for someone on that given day. So now, I’m in search of that healthy balance between living life without being tethered to wifi and how I continue to contribute my mark within this cyberspace. I’ll never claim to be even the junior varsity of examples of God’s reflection in this world, but that has always sounded like something worth reflecting in a world ever-growing colder.

“But content like that already exists, retard.”

Of course, but that doesn’t change my desire to participate, or attempt a life where I for once chase my goals while not spreading myself too thin or keep feeding coins into the carousel of being less than what people I let in ultimately deserve. The internet can very easily make one feel like the entire human-interactive system is broken, which is a fair assessment, but that doesn’t reflect the hearts of genuine souls that I’ve been blessed to encounter enough to leave zero doubt that they exist; the one’s that get things for what it is and perhaps want to counter-balance their portions of dopamine that’s cooked on a stove cranked to unfathomable levels of bullshit.

Now you’re asking the right question that definitely wasn’t pre-planned or rehearsed at all. It’s rather simple actually; I would be honored to take you on this journey that I’m on where I chase digital butterflies and challenge myself to level up my skill sets and creativity, outside the confines that society on all sides can find themselves in by default, while obviously rambling on in a manner that those who have traveled alongside the last couple years know all too well… No schedule, always-evolving, one step after the next… It’s time for me to play a different game entirely, and you are more than welcome to be a part of it. Let’s get weird…

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